I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Randomize
