is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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