One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
