batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Randomize
