I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
her facebook's as public as her vagina
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
