Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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