You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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