in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
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