i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
