1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Randomize
