i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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