im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
