This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
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