Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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