im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Randomize
