Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize
