Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize