btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
