Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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