are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
