I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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