So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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