My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize
