We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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