The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
