quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Randomize
