I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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