walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
