she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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