ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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