Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
