Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
