dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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