Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
