You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
You are the jesus of drinking
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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