the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
