Im at strip club and am horny
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
