I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
third nipple confirmed
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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