everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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