i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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