i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Randomize
