Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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