Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
