: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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