She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
