Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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