And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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