she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize