I am puke
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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