your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
