I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
